Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days. On the seventh day, Michael the archangel found him, resting. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds,"Look Michael, see what I've made..." Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?""It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance." "Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor. God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a place."What's that?" "Ah," said God. "That's Pittsburgh, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite Golden Triangle where three great rivers meet. The people of Pittsburgh are intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found traveling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them an undefeatable football team who will be admired and feared by all who come across them." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there would be BALANCE!" God replied, "Wait until you see the loud-mouth jagoffs I'm putting next to them in Cleveland." HERE WE GO STEELERS .... HERE WE GO!!!!
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For those of you who have never been to Pittsburgh all I can say is "It's a 'Burgh Thing... |
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